Déjà vu!

Déjà vu!
I’ve met you
Sometime in the distant past.
Do you believe in past lives, may I ask?

There is a longing between us that is yet unfulfilled,
A desire for intimacy that is very strong-willed.
Were you a prince and I a pauper, and societal norms kept us apart
And prevented us from dealing with matters of the heart?

Was I untouchable as a Harijan?
Were you a monk and I a seer, separated by religion?
Was sex a topic you were forbidden to discuss?
Were thoughts of passionate lovemaking confused with lust?

Did vows of chastity keep me out of your clutch?
Was I in the king’s harem, where you could only look but don’t touch?
Our souls walk slowly around a fervent fire ablaze.
Our eyes are locked intensely in one another’s gaze.

And I know that we’ve been here again and again.
I don’t know the circumstances and I don’t know when.
I feel an uncontrollable urge to engage in erotic pleasure.
I want to achieve sensual satisfaction without measure.

My insatiable appetite is eager to be set free.
Because I see before me
An irresistible delight, which I’m desirous to gorge.
Yet there is something that prevents me to forge.

So I take my time as a lioness tracking her prey.
I am eager to pounce, and yet I stay.

You See Me

My body was pressed against the wall.
“Wallflower,” I was called.
Invisible, I had hoped to be.
But there you stood in front of me,
Gazing so meticulously.

You saw my eyes, my lips, my hair.
You saw my body standing there
And wondered why I sought to stand still in camouflage as others roamed free,
And why I failed to engage in conversation and chose to be
A work of art that none could tell apart from the scenery.

Take this Time to Say

Happy Birthday!
This day is very special because you celebrate it in a new way -
In relationship with me.
It is as if our relationship was always meant to be.

Although 54 years have passed,
We’ve come together at last,
To fulfill our purpose and destiny,
In the course of events that would happen inevitably.

In a classroom of smiling faces,
You were drawn to me who had no trace
Of one,
And so our journey together then had begun.

Shrouded in loneliness,
I felt helpless and powerless,
Dissatisfied with a life of emotional pain,
Exhausted by my spirit drained.

Although I was just a young adolescent,
I was cold, stoic, and silent.
My heart had been tortured
Yet, my spirit cried out to be nurtured.

You alone heard me.
You reached out and touched me.
You played in my hair
And made me aware
That although I was at the end of my rope,
I still had life, and as long as I breathe, I have hope.

You fondled my heart with your fingertips and shocked it back into rhythm,
Which enlightened my mind to search for a new algorithm.
My words then were fleeting and few.
But let me take this time to say, “Thank you!”

1972

Yes, it’s true.
We graduated from high school in 1972.
Since then, 50 years have passed.
We survived and reunited for a blast.

Over time we’ve gotten older, a privilege denied so many.
But it’s not taken for granted. We’re thankful for years aplenty.
We’ve aged like fine wine
And have gotten better over time.

We’ve dealt with sickness, sadness, and have laid loved ones to rest.
Yet, we still stand and have passed the test.
We’ve run households, held careers, even started businesses of our own.
Each one of us has recognized that no man stands alone.

Our souls have garnered courage and strength to let friendship set the tone,
And let the relationships we have built be our capstone.
We bear the scars of our battles, but the war has been won.
We take this time to celebrate and have a little fun.

We see wrinkles, grey hair, and perhaps a few extra pounds,
But all things have worked together that we might abound
In love, joy, and peace.
May the multitude of our good deeds toward others increase.

We leave our golden celebration to march on with humility and grace
As we remember the smiles that we saw on everyone’s face.

In Your Eyes

In your eyes,
I am a young innocent virgin burgeoning into womanhood.
I surmise
That is all good.

So, I stand in your gaze.
I want only to be whom you see
And be amazed
By your vision of me.

I hide in your embrace
From those who wish to cause me harm and even from my past,
With its hardships you’ve erased
And all the missed opportunities you’ve replaced with new memories that last.

With you, I am refreshed, restored, rejuvenated, and even renewed.
Cinderella has found her prince
And has left her servitude
To her family and hence

Has found her place of honor and respect in his palace.
Rapunzel has let down her hair
And has escaped imprisonment in a phallus
Tower to find freedom and exploration of a world where

She can finally socialize.
Snow White, who by the poisoning of a witch
Dies,
Has been resurrected by her lover’s kiss.

Who said fairytales don’t come true?
I’ve taken a long look at you!

Searching for Waldo

You turn the pages of my puzzle book and search for Waldo.
Every time you’ve found me, though.
On each subsequent page, the scene grows more complicated.
But you’ve keen eyes and tried methods, and you’re extremely dedicated.

You’ve come to understand the manner that I hide in a crowd.
You hear my plea for help by my body language ‘cause I speak no word aloud.
Your tenacity in searching shows me that you know that I long to be found.
And you seem to enjoy the pursuit of discovering me as though some secret treasure abounds.

Juneteenth

 

Have you heard the decree

That you were made free?

You were made free two

Years ago and your masters knew

But they kept your freedom a secret from you

To continue to get you to toil and labor

Because your sweat was in their favor.

They fought to keep you enslaved

And were enraged

That they had lost the Civil War

And were sore

And peeved

That you might leave.

Without your power

Their fortunes would dry up that very hour.

Because they would have to do their own work:

A work

They were unskilled and too few to do.

So yes, they kept your freedom a secret from you.

But on this day, June 19, 1865,

The message of freedom has reached the last enslaved people still alive.

Now that you know you are free.

Go forth and achieve equality!

Sing

It's so easy to believe that I’m standing alone, 

Feeling nobody cares for me,

But deep in my heart I know that is wrong 

Because deep in my heart I see

That I’m singing a love song saying, "I love you. I do."

And some day my love song will echo and say, "I love you. I do."

So I know it is true

That in another’s heart I belong.

So heart, keep singing your love song.

Sing it loud. 

Sing it strong.

It won't be long. 

The Very Beginning

 

         I can’t truly understand my purpose unless I go back to the very beginning to understand God’s. Therefore, I turn to Genesis 1:1 and read the very first word. It is b’reshith, a Hebrew word, often translated “In the beginning,” but more appropriately translates “In the beginning of.”

              B’reshith contains six Hebrew letters, b (Bet (ב)), r (Resh),  e (Aleph (א)), sh (Shin ( ש )), i (Yod (י )), th (Tav (ת)), representative of the six days of creation. 

          Oddly, the bible does not begin with the first letter, Aleph (א), but with the second letter, Bet (ב). The bible is not the story of the father, but the story of the son.

In Hebrew, letters are also used for numbers. Bet represents the number 2. Genesis begins with the creation of duality. Out of eternity came the beginning of beginnings. Out of the infinite came the finite. God created heaven and drew from it earth. 

From darkness, God called light. He separated the two and established an order that they may pass before him in cyclical fashion. He called them "Night" and "Day."

 In the great expanse, God flung the stars. He established the Sun to rule the Day and the Moon to rule the Night for the earth. The Sun shone its light by day, and the moon drew its light from the sun to reflect it upon the earth by night. The two passed in a cycle and established Evening and Morning, and, out of eternity, time began.

Out of chaos, God called order. On the third day of creation, up from the fluid grave of waters, God resurrected solid land. This foreshadowed the death and resurrection of the son of God, Jesus Christ.

God created vegetation, and then formed the animal kingdom.

On the sixth day, God created his greatest creation -- man.  From man’s flesh and bone, God made woman as his companion. It takes two for relationship.

...

Hebrew letters also have picture symbols. The symbol for Bet is a box with an open-door facing heaven. It resembles a floorplan and represents a house. Being the second letter of the alphabet, it represents the son of God. 

The symbol for Resh is the head of a man. 

The symbol for Aleph is the head of an ox. It represents power, strength, and a sacrificial animal. Being the first letter of the alphabet, it represents God.

From the first 3 letters of the bible, we see that the bible is a book about God's plan for the relationship between God and man. That plan is Jesus.

 The symbol for Shin is two front teeth. It represents being pierced, bruised, and pressed. 

The symbol for Yod is an outstretched arm. 

The symbol for Tav is the cross, and it is the last letter of the alphabet.

B’reshith says that God began creation with a plan. It was to send his son to establish relationship with man and to obtain for God a house or temple in which to dwell, which is the heart of man. His son would come as the Son of Man and as the Son of God. He would be the sacrifice to take away the sin of man. His son would be pierced. He would be wounded for our transgressions and bruised for our iniquities. He would be pressed to give his life as the ultimate and final sacrifice. By this, his son would extend to man atonement with God, which he would achieve by dying on the cross. By his death, the penalty for sin would be paid in full and the work of redemption finished. His son would be risen from the dead, given the seat of the Father, and be made the First and the Last.

In this word, translated beginning, is the Word of God. The Word was with God, and the Word was God (John 1:1). 

From the very beginning, God thought of me, God desired me, and God has waited patiently for relationship with me, since the beginning of beginnings, even before time itself.

My purpose is to have an intimate and loving relationship with God. Does that not make your heart flutter?

(adapted from I Do, by Doris Trueheart)